Thankfulness!!!

Thankfulness is the emotion I have had through this whole journey I have been on. In October when I went to the doctors, she said to me I don't think this lump is anything to worry about but I want to sent you to the breast clinic to make sure. I am thankful my doctor did the right thing that day. On the day the doctor tells Martin and I that I have cancer, I was thankful that I had my husband with me and I knew he would help me along the way. Dont get me wrong, Martin and I didnt know what to say to each other except I love you. We got back into the car and just cried together, but again I was thankful that I had Martin.

The Sunday after we found out we went to church and prayed with our pastor. I am so thankful that we have a wonderful church that has supported and prayed for us along the way.

Then a week later my Mom and sister was coming to visit us. We had been planning this visit for a long time, I was so thankful they were coming talk about good timing. We were taking my boy Charlie to the Happiest Place on Earth (Disneyland Paris) for his 4th birthday. We all had a great time and tried to forget about the news we had gotten.

My Dr had ordered every test under the sun to make sure this silly cancer had not spread any where else. So I had a MRI of my breast, a CT scan, and a bone scan, then we got wonderful news it had not spread any where else. I was so thankful!!!!

One of the hardest thing  was telling people that I had cancer. But how in the world was I going to tell my 4 year old son that his mom has cancer. I prayed and prayed about this, then it came to me that I didnt ever have to use the word cancer. I just told Charlie I had a poorly boob and the dr had to take it off. He then says to me "Oh mom it will be okay I will just take care of you again." He as keep to his word he has so taken care of me. I am so thankful for him.

In November I had a mas to take the cancer away. I was thankful I only had to spend one night in the hospital, and come home to my boys. Six weeks later I was going to start chemo if I healed quickly. I again was thakful that I started chemo on December 20th.
About four hours after I finished my first chemo I started to throw up and then this stopped 3 days later. And boy was I thankful that my sickness has stopped. But the day after I had my first chemo some of my friends came by and just sat with me. I was so thankful and will always be thankful for these girls.

On December 30th I started to not feel so well, so I thought I will just lay down for bit. Then I start to feel really cold and thought I should take my temperature. And well of course I had a fever so off to  A &E we go. They run a few tests on me and it comes back that my cell count was .01 which was nothing, honestly nothing at all. They spend the next few hours given me IV antibotics to boost my cell count and the next day I went home. I was so thankful to go home. Martin and I then think this will be our new normal. But I have been so thankful that has never happened again.

The next 5 sessions of chemo where rough but hey they are behind me now. I am thankful that on my bad days, Charlie had a Dad who would take him out. Martin would take him swimming, or some of my favorites were when they would make me a cake. Those boys know how to make good cake. I am thankful for all of the girls that I work with. I live across the street from the school I work at. My friend Roxy comes to visit me everyday on her lunch break. I am so thankful for her. Somedays are long and boring but then I look at the clock and relize it is about lunch time someone will be here to visit me soon. The girls I work with are amazing and wonderful. At Christmas time last year they decided to help us out and give us money for presents and gave us some gift cards to keep us going. Do you see why I have been so thankful?? I have story after story of thankfulness. Do you want another one? One day Martin said to me we have no more money left for groceries this week. I said oh my how in the world are we going to get through this. I said a little prayer then a friend from work handed me a christmas card with money in it. Thankfulness, she didnt know how bad we needed that money. Well I could go on and on. Just know I will be forever thankful for every one of you girls at work, and all you have done for me and my family.

I have been so thankful for the team of doctors and nurses that have been taking really good care of me. I have had six sessions of chemo and they were not fun but I am now thankful they are over. I have just finished 15 sessions of radioation as well. Yesterday was my last day of active treatment!!! It is finished! I dont see my dr again until July 11th. I dont know if they will run tests or what is next to come. But I do know it is all gone and active treatment is finished.

I am so thankful that this day has come. Yesterday when I was getting my last treatment one of the nurses asked me what are you going to do tonight to celebrate? I said I am going to take my boy to swimming I am going to do normal mom things. I just want to be a normal mom again. I dont want to have appointments at the hospial, I want to be able to take my boy to the park and teach him to ride his bike and play football (soccer) with my boy. Charlie has really kept me going. God really spoke to me early on  and said do not worry I will carry you and your family through this. And boy has He carried us.

I dont want anyone to think this has been a walk in the park, because it has not. But it is over and I can be thankful for that. I want to thank every single person that has prayed for me over the past few months. I have felt them and without them I dont think this story will be the same. Thank you thank you and more thank you. I guess I can not end this with out the bigget thank you to Jesus, with out Him all of this would not have been possible so thank you Jesus.

Well January is going by winter is really here in Folkestone. This past week it has been snowing we have been having so much fun in the snow. Charlie, Martin and I have had a few snow ball fights.

I have now had 2 chemo sessions and I am doing well. The first session was a bit rough but we got through it. The second session was a lot less, well they did lower the dose by 20 percent to lower all of the side effects. I am just so thankful that I am feeling so well. The side effects only seem to last about a week then I am back to normal. Charlie thinks it is very funny that I now have no hair, it all helps to keep things very fun and light hearted. My hair started falling out a few weeks ago now. For a few days it was falling and it was very messy there was hair everywhere. So we decided the best thing to do was just to be bold and shave it all off. So Martin and Charlie shaved my head. 


This is the before the first hair cut. I have donated my hair to an organisation who make wigs for children who have caner.

 Charlie and I getting ready for it to come off!!

 Off it comes! Martin did a wonderful job. He was so careful.

 Its all gone and some how I am still smiling!

Charlie is doing so well he is really growing up. He has started swim lessons. The first week did not go so well, for some reason he did not want to get into the pool. But since then he has been the first one in the pool. Charlie also has really been into dress up lately, if he is not wearing his Peter Pan costume he is dressed up as Spiderman. He has a wonderful imagination.

Christmas 2012

We had a wonderful Christmas this year! Charlie really must have made the nice list. He is a wonderful boy, we are so thankful for him. We had a wonderful morning of opening presents and playing with all of the new toys. We went to Martins parents for a great Christmas lunch. Pops made a wonderful dinner he was cooking for days before that. It was a wonderful day. I was very thankful I felt as good as I did.

 

 

Look at all those presents!!  

 

 

 

One happy boy with his new castle. 

  

Thanks for lunch Pops!!!

 

 

 

In Folkestone on Boxing Day there are some cazy people who do this Boxing Day Dip they go into the very cold English Channel. I was smart and stayed home in the warm, but Martin took Charlie down to the beach to have a look.  

 

Run Charlie Run!! 

 

For Christmas Charlie got very lucky and got a new bike.  

 

Riding his new bike is so tiring.  

 

Charlie and his favorite girl Megan, She does have a great name and all.  Megan is our neighbor she is just a few months older then Charlie. They are great friends and have been since they were babies.